A New Year Dawns
2017 was a long year for me. I didn’t have much to say overall, as is evidenced by my unusual lack of blog posts. It was a difficult year, full of events, failures, rejections, and encounters I’d like to put behind me. It was not all bad, though, there were shining moments of happiness and peace the made me feel hope for the future. I call that a success, considering the noted lack of enthusiasm for 2017 in last years’ New Year New Life post.
What did I accomplish from 2016’s To Do List? Most importantly, I did get a propane torch for flame weeding the gardens. This has made gardening about 80% more fun because shooting fire at weeds feels fantastic and is therapeutic. I worked on replying to people even when I am having trouble reaching out; I started visiting a local club that gives me people to talk to when I am feeling isolated and need to reach out. I did a lot less worrying because I seem to have developed an,”if it happens, it happens” attitude – I now simply let go of worry because I have given up on trying to know what to do. I can’t tell if that’s positive or not, but the less I worry, the better off I am. I kept moving. I drank water and ate food. I stayed alive. Everything else on the list was a wash but it’s okay because I’ll continue to work on them in the coming year.
To Do List, 2018
– Be and feel more organized. This includes tightening up my daily schedule so I don’t feel lost or restless within a day.
– Work on getting out of town and onto acreage.
– Work on building my businesses full time so that I can feel financially secure.
– Learn silversmithing and/or metalsmithing.
– Finish my Pimsleur Swedish lessons and feel fluent afterward.
– Get my gardens to their full potential by planting earlier and establishing a set maintenance routine.
– Let go of the few guilt-bound issues that are still bothering me.
– Follow up on all the ideas I’ve written in my little blue notebook.
– Take more time to enjoy the quiet moments.
– Keep moving, keep changing, keep growing.
I think I can do these things and much more. I am entering 2018 with the feeling that I can do what I set my mind to if I keep moving and looking toward the future. I feel like I am shaping my destiny, not impotently watching it be written. I want to be enthusiastic and know that I am doing what I need to do to feel happiness. I want to feel unencumbered by the weight of other people’s darkness. This coming year will be different because I am going to make it different. I may not have control over what happens to me, but I have learned how to control my reaction to it. I will live with intention and strive to do what I can do each day because that is enough. This will be a brighter year.
Goodbye, 2017, you shall not be missed.
Hello 2018, you are full of potential and hope.