By Jane Tanfei|Mar 12 2015 | Thoughts
I’ve been working on my self-esteem this year. One of my goals for 2015 is to become confident. At this point in my life, I’m giving a big FU to whoever has told or will tell me I’m worthless. I realize now that people tell me that kind of thing as a type of manipulation […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Mar 06 2014 | Psychology, Thoughts
Sometimes, I feel despair because I think about how my emotions are pointless and useless – they are good for nothing besides causing me pain. I was thinking about how I’m always out of sync – feeling happy things when socially I “should” feel bad, or seeing negativity where others only see positive things. Most […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Mar 03 2014 | Psychology, Thoughts
Over the past week, I’ve had two more encounters to practice my “walk away from rude people” skills with. It is not easy. I’m trying to stick by the idea: they start insults, I walk away. On the second encounter (multiple people, typical mob mentality), I was talking to one person when a second person […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Feb 27 2014 | Metaphysical Discussion, Psychology, Thoughts
Sometimes, I go out and play live music. On one such recent occasion, I had a pretty good time, and then I suddenly started to feel very alone. I felt really empty and isolated, despite the fact that there were kind people around and it had been a joyful evening. The strangest part is that […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Feb 24 2014 | Psychology, Thoughts
I just realized what I have learned about myself in the past few days: I don’t want to be detached anymore. It’s strange to think that, but I recognize now that I usually am detached because it is a way to protect myself from emotional upset. I think now that I understand the reality that […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Feb 24 2014 | Curiousity, Thoughts
The one thing I don’t like about my life is that is intermittently, against my will, chaotic. I get stuck in ideas sometimes – trying to figure out the point of these situations. I know, intuitively, that there is a reason for those experiences, but I have a hard time just accepting that the “ah-ha moment” […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Feb 10 2014 | Curiousity, Metaphysical Discussion, Thoughts
There is a set of ideas floating around my head – a qualitative and definitive understanding relative to my current emotions and thoughts and evoked by recent events in my life. The main tenets of this soon-to-be formulated understanding of my world: 1) Fear is irrelevant. 2) Money is irrelevant. 3) Intuition is key. 4) […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Jan 26 2014 | Rant
I am so angry right now, at you and your lifelong friendships and wonderful family members and that you only ever have to worry about superficial problems, that you get to live your life of luck and pleasantry. I am so angry at myself, because I feel sick of how I feel in my life. […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Jan 20 2014 | Thoughts, Writings
So, this morning I am thinking about humans and our need to judge others by our own fickle standards. I was already kind of thinking about this as I did my morning trudge; I’d been considering the frustration I feel at the automatic mental comparisons I do every day. Not because I want to, but […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Jan 15 2014 | Curiousity, Humor, Psychology, Thoughts
So, I’ve been preoccupied lately with trying to figure out exactly what people get out of romantic relationships. Basically, this consists of watching the interactions of couples, and taking mental notes about types of relationships vs. the body language and demeanor of the subjects. Maybe that sounds bizarre, but that’s how it really is for […]
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