By Jane Tanfei|Jun 29 2015 | Rant, Thoughts
My thoughts today are hectic and full of pervasive anxiety. I wish there was a switch I could flip to turn myself into someone else. I wish I could be something, anything, else. I guess I’m acutely feeling all the things that are “wrong” with me – people keep pointing out the things they don’t like about me […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Dec 09 2013 | Psychology, Thoughts
I believe my oldest son has Asperger Syndrome. I also believe it’s my fault. Logically, I understand that this is a fallacy of thought. I can’t help what genetics he got from me, I didn’t even KNOW I had Asperger’s until he was eight years old. But, emotionally, I feel like I am responsible for […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Aug 19 2013 | Dreams, Humor, Rant, Thoughts
I should be asleep. Indeed, I will need to wake up in another few hours for an hour of travel via public transportation to get to work since both of my vehicles bit the dust last week. Never mind that my only duty in life is to go to work for eight hours of every […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Jul 15 2013 | Rant, Thoughts, Writings
I was born in the state of California within the United States of America. This makes my nationality US American, my ethnicity Californian, and my race Human. Not that this is acceptable by general American standards, but these are the facts. I consider myself an American because I live in the USA. I don’t feel like […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Jun 17 2013 | Metaphysical Discussion, Psychology, Thoughts
I wonder what it would be like to feel attachment to people, places, things? One of the strangest things about me is that I have very little attachment to anyone or anyplace or anything. Internally, when I feel myself begin to get too attached to someone or something, I automatically shut off those feelings because […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|May 16 2013 | Poetry, Thoughts, Writings
There was a button in my pocket. I touched it just to see If this button was a button That might help me. I left it there awhile, I even forgot. I put my hand in my pocket, Smiled at what my fingers sought. I pulled the button out, Studied it with intent. I don’t […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Apr 22 2013 | Curiousity, Rant, Thoughts
I’m in a truly bad mood right now. I hardly ever say what I honestly feel like saying because my true thoughts tend to be blunt and everyone is so easily offended these days that the truth is no longer considered “a good thing”. But I feel like saying what I feel so I’m going […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Mar 31 2013 | Dreams, Thoughts
I am awake early this morning, the last morning of my vacation, feeling overtired yet restless. I am in dire need of sleep, but cannot go back to sleep. I feel an acute and overpowering sadness. I wake up in the middle of the night sometimes, needing to say things. But, there is nobody to […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Dec 30 2012 | Curiousity, Rant, Thoughts
The one thing I have struggled with the most of any of my faulty behaviors is that of being a “people pleaser”. By this, I mean that in any situation where someone disagrees with me, I immediately fold my opinions, emotions, thoughts, beliefs, and desires into a neat little package and throw them away because […]
Continue Reading →By Jane Tanfei|Nov 07 2012 | Rant, Thoughts
I am feeling upset and disgusted and discouraged and hopeless. I am tired of emotional vampires. I am tired of baseless accusations. I am tired of being judged on every single action I take. I am tired of being judged on every single action I don’t take. Someone once told me, “We are not judged […]
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